Loss of a Family Member

Articles

  • Terrible, Thanks for Asking: What I’ve Learned About Grief

    Posted on January 24, 2026 - by Larry Carlat

    I’ve never loved anyone the way I loved Rob. Six years ago, I joined the world’s worst club when my older son shot and killed himself. He was 28. Rob suffered from depression, bipolar disorder, and alcoholism. After he died, it was my turn to find out what suffering really means.   After he died, it was my turn to find out what suffering really means.     In the first few weeks and months, I was gutted and in shock. So were my ex-wife, Caryn and my younger son, Zach. Our family had been destroyed. The whole thing seemed surreal—time was out […]

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  • The Soul Knows When It’s Time to Go

    Posted on December 20, 2025 - by Larry Carlat

    Trying to make sense of suicide is a fool’s errand, and I’ve been that fool ever since my son Rob died. Losing any relative to suicide is traumatic, but it’s particularly devastating for parents, who feel like a failure in the most important job of their lives.   I tortured myself for the better part of two years, asking the same questions over and over again—is there anything we could’ve done to prevent Rob from doing what he did?   In the days and weeks after his death, the answer seemed obvious: yes! For God’s sake, I was with him […]

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  • The Big Red Purse

    Posted on October 1, 2025 - by Linda Henderson

    Andrea, I was hoping you could lend me one of your big purses. I opened the closet where they are stored. To my disappointment, the big ones I remember were not there. I’m not sure, perhaps I lent them on your behalf, and my grief brain doesn’t remember. At first, I was disappointed and sad, a minor frustration compared to the grief I carry daily, but it caused me to pause. I know you understand. I started to look in the closet quietly, and my eyes focused on the purse you had that day—the beautiful lilac-colored one with darker purple […]

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  • Winter Grief Activities and Projects

    Posted on January 28, 2025 - by John Pete

    The long winter months can be especially confining, isolating and challenging when grieving a loss. But you can also engage in unique ways that will help you bear your loss. Here are some winter grief activities and projects (or for any time of year): start an indoor gardens/terrariums/terrarium memorial garden take up a new hobby/craft, learn new skills/enhance existing ones enroll in an online class (many are self-paced) write your autobiography or a biography about your loved one start a Blog (many free options with public/private settings) volunteer at church, care-facilities and non-profits plan and gather materials for spring projects give […]

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  • Young People Grieving Over Multiple Losses

    Posted on September 23, 2024 - by Linda Goldman

    Young People Grieving Over Multiple Losses  A “new normal” has invaded old paradigms and left kids missing a past world, uncertain of the present, and anxious of what tomorrow will bring. More than ever, adults must become role models, listen to their children’s pleas, understand the forces behind their behaviors, and care for their tender hearts yearning to be heard and respected. Perhaps the new normal is just an open door into the transformation of antiquated ways of being that have outgrown themselves The issues and grief techniques found in the previous edition of my book, Life and Loss, are […]

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  • Young People Grieve Through Creativity

    Posted on September 23, 2024 - by Linda Goldman

    Young People Grieve Through Creativity During the pandemic, the resilience of many girls and boys soared to new levels as they courageously rose to the occasion. The following are two examples of pioneering teens, Madeleine and Lulu. Through using their attributes of perseverance and connectivity, they were both able to transform despair into activism. Thirteen-year-old Madeleine converted an eighth-grade project into a healing experience for peers experiencing a death during the pandemic. Madeleine created the COVID Memorial Quilt. She encourages others her age to join by adding a piece of the quilt in memory of a loved one.  Madeleine’s Mom […]

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  • Young People’s Grief during the Pandemic

    Posted on September 22, 2024 - by Linda Goldman

    Young People’s Grief during the Pandemic The pandemic has produced a myriad of loss issues impossible to have imagined just a few years ago. Young people cannot go to school, eat lunch in the cafeteria, play with friends, see their teachers in-person, enjoy recess, learn in a classroom, or partake in the holidays with their entire family. College students who come home for family holidays are continuously anxious about getting the virus or giving it to their parents. Sara, a college freshman explained, “I’ve had seven COVID19 tests and am doing one more before Thanksgiving. It is so stressful. I […]

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  • Telling Young Children of a Suicide

    Posted on August 26, 2024 - by Bob Baugher

    Telling Young Children of a Suicide Parents are often understandably concerned about how the harsh fact of a suicide in the family, particularly of a parent, will affect their children. They may wonder whether telling their children–particularly young children–the truth about the death will cause more harm than good. And if they do decide to tell their children the truth, they struggle to find the words to explain what they find very hard to understand themselves – “Why did this person take their life?” It is important to know something about the developmental processes that children experience as they grow […]

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  • When One Loss Follows Another

    Posted on May 27, 2024 - by Anne Peterson

    I’m 12 years old and our family is living in a 3rd floor apartment. The phone rings on this summer day. Mom answers. I watch the color leave her face. I hear sentence fragments. “A lone driver…he didn’t see her…the truck was backing up……a closed casket.” Hanging up the phone, Mom tells all of us to come and sit down. She said that Julie, our six-year-old cousin, had won a bicycle and she ran outside to ride it. Julie hoped everyone would see her, but the garbage man didn’t. Julie died. It was hard to see my mom cry. It […]

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  • Don’t Shield Your Children from Grief

    Posted on November 19, 2023 - by Beth Marshall

    In our predominantly fun childhood, the one thing kids were never allowed to do was to participate in the funeral-related activities when someone passed away. Grief and sadness were simply not on the agenda. When someone died, my brothers, sisters, and I would keep playing kickball and jumping on the trampoline, while our parents did funeral things. After the service, we rarely talked about the person who had died. Even in the years that followed, we didn’t do much to remember our beloved family members who were now gone. As an adult, I learned quickly that shielding kids from sorrow […]

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  • Guiding a Child Through Parent-Loss: A Mother’s Story

    Posted on June 5, 2023 - by Dr. Carol Leibovich Mankes

    Guiding a Child Through Parent-Loss Losing a parent is a profound and challenging experience, especially for children. The loss of her beloved father forever changed my daughter’s world when she was just 10 years old. The emotional road she has traveled in seven years has been a rollercoaster ride, filled with moments of both strength and vulnerability. In the immediate aftermath of her father’s passing, my daughter was confronted with a whirlwind of emotions. As her mom, I had the daunting task of giving her the sad news. I made a decision, right before his passing, of allowing her to […]

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  • Helping Children After Mass Tragedies

    Posted on June 20, 2022 - by Bob Baugher

    Children Shocked by Mass Tragedies In 1963, it was the assassination of a president. In 1986, it was the explosion of the Space Shuttle witnessed by millions of children on TV. September 11, 2001, was the terrorist attack. For the past 20 years it has been school shootings, the most recent in Uvalde, Texas.  Each of these shocking events thrusts our children into the face of death in a sudden and graphic way. Imagine that you are a ten-year-old child. Kids your age were killed as they innocently sat in their classroom.  Many questions spring to your young mind: “Am […]

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  • Grieving Children, Teens Have All the Feelings

    Posted on June 13, 2022 - by Greg Adams

    Grieving People Have All the Feelings Sometimes a death impacts a school or community organization, like a church or Boy Scout troop. A child or teacher dies, and I am invited to facilitate a one-time grief support discussion with children or teenagers. It’s a very condensed experience. I start with establishing rapport and gradually (but also quickly) move into talking about death in movies and books, the difference between grief and mourning, and the person who died. We start with the person and their life because while their death and how they died was very important, even more important is the […]

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  • All of Us Grieve After Mass Shootings

    Posted on June 13, 2022 - by Samantha Ruth

    Every single day, I’m seeing news of another mass shooting. It’s not okay. And more than expressing our concern about gun laws, we need to have the conversations about grief. All of us grieve after mass shootings. We are traumatized. But few acknowledge the significance of this grief, let alone address it. So we need to have the conversations. With ourselves, each other, our children. Parents all over the globe want to protect their children. For many, this means shielding them from adult topics. But when is protecting actually harming? Children Mourn a Shooting This is the world we live in. These are […]

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  • Telling the Children that Mom is Going to Die

    Posted on April 29, 2022 - by Stedman Stevens

    Telling the Children My wife was dying, and telling the children was the next step. My wife and I struck out on our journey to prepare, protect, and parent our three sweet teenage daughters. There is no right or wrong way to convey this message. But there may be better or worse ways to help your children transition through one of the most difficult experiences of their young lives. Oddly, we did not realize the enormity of the task we were undertaking at the time, probably due to stress, fatigue, and emotional exhaustion. But we both felt in telling the […]

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Open to Hope TV

  • Episode 259: The Loss No One Sees: Grief in a Newborn’s World

    Posted on December 15, 2025 - by admin

    The impact of a death on a newborn’s world is a minimized and unacknowledged loss. Join host Dr. Gloria Horsley, and her daughter and co-host, Dr. Heidi Horsley and their guest Dr. Sarah Vollmann, whose sister died before she was born in a drowning accident. Sarah is a registered board-certified art therapist, licensed clinical social worker, and faculty member of The Portland Institute. She is the Associate Director of The Young Widowhood Project, and the Author of: Born Into Loss: Shadows of a Deceased Sibling.    

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  • Episode 227: Grief and The Preservation of Self

    Posted on September 27, 2024 - by admin

    How do we take care of ourselves when we are so busy taking care of others after a loss? Join Host Dr. Heidi Horsley and her guests Tysha Scott and Anne Smith as they discuss the importance of the preservation of self. Tysha Scott is the owner and management consultant of TS Management Consulting and is the Executive Board Member of Classic Stage Company. Tysha has been a theater teacher for middle school, high school, and college. She was married to Phillip Randall Scott for 30 yrs. until his untimely death. Anne Smith is one of nine children, and her […]

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  • Episode 221: Navigating Children’s Grief

    Posted on July 15, 2024 - by admin

    Are you wondering how to connect with grieving children and help them navigate their grief?  Join host Dr. Heidi Horsley and her co-host Doneley Meris, along with guests Lindsey Whissel Fenton and Greg Adams, as they discuss tips and tools to support grieving children.  Doneley Meris is the Founder and Director of the HIV Arts Network and an adjunct faculty member at NYU and Hunter College. Lindsey Whissel Fenton is the creator of Speaking Grief and Learning Grief, and host of The Apologies Podcast.  She also serves on the Board of Directors for the National Alliance for Childrens’ Grief.  Greg […]

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  • Episode 185: Surviving Terrorism, Mass Violence, and Traumatic Loss

    Posted on September 10, 2021 - by admin

    Suffered a traumatic loss? Join Dr. Heidi Horsley and her guests Maureen Basnicki, Heather Dearman and Sallie Lynch founding members of the Survivors of Tragedy Outreach Program (STOP) an initiative created by Tuesday’s Children. Get a message of hope and learn how peer connections and support can be key components to your recovery.

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  • Episode 184: Parent Loss and Childhood Trauma

    Posted on September 7, 2021 - by admin

    You are stronger than you think you are!  Join Dr. Heidi Horsley and her guests to explore childhood trauma, Inner strength, and the strength of community.  Guests include Marie Clyne and Robert Pycior, who lost a mother and father in the 9/ll terrorist attacks and Kathy Murphy, Program Director of Tuesday’s Children.

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