Mary, Provo, Utah writes
My son Danny died a year ago of an infection at age three. I am now wondering what to do with all his toys. It is too painful for me to keep them in a room as a memorial for him, yet I know how much he loved them. What should I do?

Drs. Gloria and Heidi Horsley respond:

We are so very sorry to hear about the death of your little boy. As a bereaved mother and sibling we want you to know that we understand how difficult it is to part with our loved one’s possessions. After Scott died, we left his football game under his bed for a very long time because we couldn’t bear to get rid of it.

It sounds like you are thinking that you might want to start giving a few things away. We would suggest that you think of children or places that would enjoy the toys. You may want to give some away to Danny’s friends or relatives. Another suggestion is that you give his toys to a hospital, family shelter or a nursery school. I’m sure those children would cherish the toys and would find joy in them, just as Danny did. Don’t feel that you have to give them all away at once. You might also want to keep a couple of Danny’s favorite toys that make you smile in his remembrance.

Our best,

Drs. Gloria and Heidi