by Sandy Fox

I found a web site bereaved mothers may be interested in looking at and even joining. The site is www.angelmoms.com .

Through their pain, these mothers have bonded together to offer each other love, support and understanding, something we all need. Their email group of moms chats daily, sharing tears and laughter.

As I opened the site, the song “You’ll Never Walk Alone” played in the background. I felt very comfortable and comforted looking at this lovely site and reading about what they have done for each other and for others out there, not even members.

If you read about their beginnings, a few mothers who had connected and formed an email group has grown to way over 200 members. “Nothing can take away the pain of losing a child,” they say, “but being able to share it with others who know and understand your pain helps.”

Angel Moms come from all walks of life, have lost children of all ages, to different causes and are at different stages of grief, but their loss bonds them together like nothing else can. “We joke a lot, we cry a lot; we do things together; we can talk or just listen…we are here for each other,” says Judi Walker, one of the founders.

On their web site you can find a list of their members, how the children died and their death dates, newsletters they have written (with information, poetry and writings from other bereaved moms), acts of kindnesses done by these moms for others, and their meeting times (if you live in the area). If not, conferences have also been held where moms come together from all over to share their lives and that of their children. And, of course, there is email to connect everyone. Guidelines for the group are also on the site.

Judy Walker wrote a beautiful poem in memory of her son Shane and all the other children who have left this world. I used the words at a candle lighting ceremony at a national childless conference I was in charge of a few years ago in Scottsdale, AZ, and have never forgotten them. I hope you all at your own special time and place light a candle for your child and relive the wonderful memories. I share this poem with you and hope you will look at the site for further information.

I Light This Candle

I light this candle in memory of you.
My life, my child, my heart,
May it shine bright and true,
As you did from the start.

In it’s flickering flame I see,
The life we shared together,
The love and wonderful memories,
That I’ll carry with me forever.

I light this candle in memory of you.
I look up to the Heavens where you are,
I see the lights of Heaven shining bright too,
But your candle shines brighter than the brightest star.

My child, you are still so much a part of me,
Even though you are no longer here.
You live on in my heart where you will always be,
No matter what, I will always keep you there.

On this special night I light this candle for you,
And I hope every one who sees it will know,
How very special you are, how much you are loved and missed too,
And will remember you with me when they see its golden glow…

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Sandy Fox

Sandy Fox has won four finalist awards for her recent book "Creating a New Normal...After the Death of a Child" with over 80 coping articles and a huge resource section. One award is from USA Book News in the Health/Death and Dying Category for 2010. The second award is from ForeWord Reviews in the Health Category for 2010. The third is from Royal Dragonfly Book Awards. The most recent finalist award is for the self-help category of the 2011 Indie Book Awards. She is also the author of another grief book, "I Have No Intention of Saying Good-bye." “I Have No Intention of Saying Good-bye” tells the stories of 25 sets of parents and how they moved on with their lives after the death of their child, offering hope and survival techniques. Sandy has headed two national bereavement conferences for childless parents and spoken for many years at Compassionate Friends National conferences, POMC and across the U.S. to a variety of bereavement groups. She also writes articles for the Open to Hope site, EZ articles, and Journey through grief newsletter in addition to her own weekly blog: www.survivinggrief.blogspot.com. Sandy can be contacted at sfoxaz@hotmail.com to set up any speaking engagements or to ask any questions related to surviving the death of a child. Sandy was a guest on the radio show “Healing the Grieving Heart“ discussing: “I have no intention of Saying Good-Bye: Coping Techniques for the Now Childless.” To hear Sandy being interviewed on this show by Dr. Gloria & Dr. Heidi Horsley, click on the following link: www.voiceamericapd.com/health/010157/horsley010407.mp3

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