Open to Hope Articles

Articles Home

When Deaths Accumulate

Posted on July 14, 2019 - by Judy Lipson

One life ends, and a new chapter begins. My father’s decline and ultimate death emancipated me, letting the reins loose that I held so tightly. My father and I had spoken daily. I knew the loss of my father, another colossal void in my life, would ensure a huge devastating blow to me. The clock started ticking to do the work necessary to grieve for my sisters, Margie and Jane, who had died years before. My father’s departure altered and transformed the family nucleus. How do we pick up the pieces of a broken family where the crystal had been […]

I Will Always Love You

Posted on July 11, 2019 - by Judy Lipson

Much as twins often have a sense when the other is in danger, so do some sisters. The night Jane died, the exact time of her death, both Margie and I woke up at 3:30 AM. We knew. I have no recollection of Jane’s funeral or the Shiva. It is all a fog. I know Margie and I wrote something about our younger sister that the Rabbi read as part of his eulogy. Jane (to us, Janie, our dear sweet little sister): From our earliest memories on Indian Ridge Road, when you cried having your picture taken, you were always too […]

What Grief Has Taught Me

Posted on July 9, 2019 - by Lisa Boehm

My daughter Katie is now in heaven. Everything is new. Everything is different. Everything is devastatingly difficult. I’ve learned to walk, breathe, and exist without letting grief keep me down, because I’m learning to live with my grief. I know that grief will be my companion forever, so I must learn to get along with it. Losing my daughter has been the single worst thing that has happened to me, yet I feel I have learned so much. I struggle to say that there is good in Katie’s death, or any child’s death, but I will say that there has […]

Ten Ways To Keep Your Spouse’s Memory Alive

Posted on July 9, 2019 - by Peggy Bell

Becoming widowed is a gut-wrenching experience. It brings so much sadness and loneliness to our lives. It takes a huge adjustment to get through those days along the grief journey. We never get over the loss, but we can attempt to do things that make it more bearable for ourselves. One idea we may want to try is to keep their memory alive. Doing this allows you to hold onto a piece of them forever. Below are ten suggestions to consider if you want to do this. Display their collections – If your spouse had a hobby, you can frame […]

Widowers: Don’t Expect Others to Know What To Do

Posted on June 28, 2019 - by Herb Knoll

Following the passing of a wife or life-partner, it is the widower who needs support, not the deceased. So why is it that so many widowed men complain about their sense of abandonment by their families, friends, neighbors, and co-workers following their loss? Behaviors and interactions with those who you would hope would be of some level of support to the widowers, can instead become hurtful, insensitive, and at times, clumsy. Case in point, on the first morning, I was back at my bank job in San Antonio, and while seated at my desk, one of our human resource officers […]

Difficult Grief: Three Steps to Compassion for Yourself and Others

Posted on June 25, 2019 - by Nina Impala

Overall humans can be pretty hard on themselves. It seems like I am always telling my clients not be to be so hard on themselves. Watch the self-talk. Imagine yourself as child you love so dearly; would you talk to them that way if they were going through a difficult time? When I have compassion for others, it is because I can feel another’s anger, sadness and/or pain. I don’t take it on, but I can feel it. I hold that space with them and bring in an energy of loving kindness for the pain they are experiencing. Working in […]

Angels Walk Among Us

Posted on June 24, 2019 - by Herb Knoll

“Hi, my name is Richard.” Thus began my knowing a giant of a man named Richard Blount (62) as he sat down in the chair beside me. The occasion was my first meeting at GriefShare, a widely available program for those who have experienced a loss in their life. I was attending the program as part of the research I was conducting for my then soon-to-be-released book, The Widowers Journey. I would soon come to realize that Richard, a native of Tampa, Florida, was no ordinary man. Built like a linebacker from your favorite football team, Richard is also a […]

Gratitude and Grief – Is it Possible?

Posted on June 23, 2019 - by Lisa Boehm

My experience with gratitude began about five minutes after the police and coroner visited our home the night my daughter Katie died. I remember being thankful that she died instantly. I remember being thankful that she didn’t have any passengers. I remember wanting to thank the entire emergency crew that was at the scene. What? Who is grateful within minutes of learning that their child has died? I guess that would be me and I really can’t tell you why. But it’s the truth. I remember being in the thick of early grief and dealing with other family issues and […]

The Gift Of Tears and Forgiveness

Posted on June 23, 2019 - by Jill Smoot

Recently, I was watching a television interview with a woman who began to apologize to the reporter for “almost crying.” I understood that. Don’t let people see your hurt, don’t be a cry-baby. That was me, seven years before the death of our oldest child. That’s hen everything inside of me underwent radical changes, and these have all been for good in my life. It has been like having my senses heightened to what I have, not what I’ve lost. I found that I could be vulnerable. Like the shedding of tears. Crying for me was a private affair, something I could […]

Fly On

Posted on June 22, 2019 - by Rosemary James

“You found your wings, then you flew away from me,” resonates off the newly painted, lantern-gold bedroom walls. A brighter color to enliven my spirits. We had decided to paint a couple years ago, but didn’t get around to it. The country red was too somber. Lost to the music, I cradle the black, rectangle box that encases you, tighter with each word, swaying to the rhythm of our song. The haunting violin riff intensifies the anguish in my heart, the wrenching and hollowness few understand. Suffocating with each breath, I allow the pain to trickle slowly from my eyes. […]