My son, Michael, was born 30 years ago today. It would have been amazing to see what he would have looked like. I often dream about what he would be doing with his life. Married? Kids? Or… still living at home?!?
Well, he is still at home. His stocking is on my fireplace at Christmas. His picture is on the mantle and in my home office. Michael is also at work, in my wallet, and on the internet. His rap CD, just recently created from old cassette tapes, is being heard by others for the first time. And people who never had the opportunity to know him, feel that their lives have been blessed through him.
So I do see what Michael looks like on this special day, his 30th birthday. Together, we continue to share a story. He helps me to grow and evolve from within. He is there to guide me when I feel down and there to celebrate my successes. He has blessed my family tremendously by helping them to heal. Michael has a powerful presence in the lives of my friends, many of whom feel that they know him without ever having met him.
I can truly say that this is the first time in 12 years, that I feel at peace on his birthday. Funny, it’s his birthday, but my son has given me a gift. Knowing that, what could I possibly give him today? Well… I do have the perfect present for him. It’s what he’s been asking for since July 22, 1998. It just took time, patience, and a lot of real, hard, life-changing work to get this gift just right.
Today, I honor and celebrate the life of my son, Michael, by living my own life with more passion, purpose and pride than I had ever imagined.
Happy Birthday, Michael! You continue to make a difference in my life, and now you do the same for so many others. In more ways than you and I can imagine.
I love you Michael (Skeeter), my son, my friend, my love! — Dad
Ron Villano 2011
Tags: signs and connections
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MICHAEL!!!!!! Ron, congratulations for your love for your son and for the many ways he touches your life. Alicia
Hi Ron,
What a beautiful article! I am sorry for your loss and glad you are living your new life with purpose and passion. I, too, find inspiration in my deceased daughter. Because of her, I do things I may not ordinarily do and write things I wouldn’t ordinarily write. Sometimes I think I can hear her voice. Your deceased son is part of you, as my daughter is part of me.
Harriet
Hi Ron,
What a beautiful letter. I lost my 18 year old daughter a little over 4 years ago and I hope by the 12th year, that I too will be able to find peace on her birthday. For now, I only find agony. Thanks for sharing, that always seems to help and give hope.
Regards,
Mary
Your letter really spoke to my soul… Our son
David died 2 years ago through a tramatic set of circumstances, I feel a bit like Mary above,,, I have become good at compartmentalizing, but memories bring pain right now. My son was 21 and adopted from Korea… Thank you for sharing….
Am glad that you finally have peace and live life with a purpose.My sister died one month ago due to wrong medication in pregnancy when she was just two weeks due. I deleted her birthday from my events, but on reading this, i think i’ll retrieve it, maybe i’ll one time celebrate her life with peace and gladness.
Thank you for sharing your son and the way you express his life with love. My boy’s are always close to the xmas tree so they can celerate with the family, they are always with us in so many ways. We have Bicycle Safety day, free helmets & rodeo in Keith’s (9 yrs) name & Jason (32Days) It;s been 38 yrs and 27 yrs-still seems like yesterday, today is my birthday and I love and miss them dearly, my “Angel’s” are close by. God Bless You
Good day. Sir Ron, you and I have the same experience. I lost my child 2 years ago. He was celebrating his 8th birthday this coming March 2. And the whole family really miss him. From the moment he died, I ask the Lord why he did not gave us fair fight with his illness. All the symptoms were emerge after he died. Everytime we visit him at her tomb, we cry to hard because the incident was not yet acceptable to us. Every year we still celebrate his natal day. And I know someday and somehow we can accept what happened to him.
God Bless and more power.
were thinking of attending a meeting next week we lost our little girl 15 mths ago and its getting unbearable i really need help and direction. does anyone think anam cara would really be the right place to turn.
My heart goes out to all of you. Losing a child is truly the worst possible life experience. My son went to heaven on October 22, 2010. It has been an extremely painful nine months. counseling, group therapy, none of it takes away the pain but it does allow me to share it with others in the same position. My son’s 25th birthday will be on August 6th. we will have a bbq and his favorite cheesecake and light sparklers and twirl them around and probably cry and cry and cry. I said I could not live without him and I was right. I do not know how to begin. I do try for my girls but its so difficult. I hope one day I can feel some peace. For now HOPE is what we have. HOPE Helping Other Parents Endure. Hugs for all of you. Always Dillon’s mom
Tomorrow is my son, Frank’s, 50th birthday. I miss him so much. He died November 7, 2012 from an overdose. I want to feel joy again. Than you.