When there are issues about past occurrences in your life, we know that letting go is easier said than done. And this is especially true for people who lost a love one, or someone who they care about. The problem is, most people use these everyday responsibilities and the issues they face every day to mask having to deal with issues of their past. In other words they are camouflaging the real problem. Whether it’s career, family, health, a failed romance, a death – many people have their own stories to share. They are just seldom heard.

Especially if you are a busy person, however, this is such a broad description. People are busy with work; others can be full-time parents dealing with several kids at home. Other parents are working overtime and sometimes two jobs. Still others are single parents who are balancing a job or two with the responsibilities of raising and supporting their children.

One of the most common reasons for feeling unhappy or second guessing life is envy or jealousy of what other people have. This is human nature that we want what we don’t have and are unsatisfied with what we do have.

Career women envy those women with loving husbands and children, while the full-time moms wonder what it would have been like had they chosen to stay in their jobs and put that first before raising a family.

Successful men may feel jealous at their business counterpart who has a spouse who resembles a movie star, while wonder if his career plaid a part. When you’re comparing yourself to others and evaluating your own life, it paves the way for looking back into your past and wishing that things might have turned out differently.

So what can you do? 

It is a very easy thing to be dissatisfied with your past. And we sometimes fall into the trap of looking at where we are now, and wishing we could have done things differently in the past. What you must understand is that you are where you are now, and there is nothing you can do to change what has already happened.

The key is to see your past as something positive and look forward to a better future. Each past occurrences brings unique experiences that you can draw lessons from, whether they were good or bad experiences. This doesn’t mean that you can’t reflect on what has already happened; you shouldn’t dwell on past decisions or “what ifs” and instead learn from them and carve a life you can be happy about.

No doubt that everyone has a chance for a more satisfying, happy future. But that can only come with the realization that the past is your foundation to build a strong and happy life. Don’t get stuck in feelings of regret, envy, or hate. No matter what has happened or what may happen, look to future with a bright, positive eye! The best is yet to come.

Carl Mathis 2011

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Carl Mathis

Carl Mathis' wife passed in December of 2005. He was suddenly left with the pain of losing a loved one, the burden of raising three boys on his own, and the challenge of filling both motherly and fatherly roles. Depression set in. He wanted to quit. But in the midst crying out to God for a way to overcome the pain, it was revealed to him that in the process of helping others overcome, he too would triumph and overcome the obstacles of life. If he would have thrown in the towel in 2005, Mathis would have never published his debut novel, "Life is What You Make It: Build a Better Life for You and Your Family," or his upcoming book, "Life is What You Make It: Seven Steps to Moving Forward." In addition to his most recently published works, he also writes feature stories for The Royal Chronicle, his church’s monthly newsletter. Currently serving as a minister and elder at Holy Ghost Tabernacle Ministries in Goulds, FL, Mathis is no stranger to work in the ministry. Besides teaching bible classes, he spends a significant amount of time volunteering with Shepherds Care, an outreach program designed to help those in need and the homeless. Mathis is also furthering his theological studies through the National Alliances of Progressive Churches. Together with his charisma and determination to see people prosper worldwide, he is certainly one of the chosen vessels for a time such as this—a time where people see no hope and give up on dreams. Carl Mathis seeks to not only give people hope and encouragement for a season, but for a lifetime.

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