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Film Review: Random Hearts

Posted on March 9, 2009 - by Stephanie Frogge

By Stephanie Frogge — Some years ago, what began as date night for my boyfriend and me with a rented copy of “Random Hearts” ended with an unexpected discussion of the nature of grief and expressions of mourning. The movie and our subsequent reactions to it helped frame my understanding of what constitutes  normal  grief reaction. “Random Hearts” (1999) stars Harrison Ford and Kristin Scott Thomas as strangers who become acquainted when their respective spouses are killed in a plane crash. As the story unfolds, we begin to suspect that Dutch Van Den Broeck (Ford), a detective with the Washington, […]

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Opening Grief as a Gift

Posted on March 8, 2009 - by Alice Wisler

By Alice J. Wisler — Some view grief as a dirty word. It’s associated with pain, hardship, suffering, endless days of crying and never seeing the sun. It’s hard – tough on the body, spirit and mind. No one wants to have to go through grief. All hope to avoid it. The Oxford Dictionary defines “grief” as the media does – intense mourning. I know that’s true because when Daniel first died, the agonizing pain was intense. To walk into a store was painful. Seeing my surviving children and knowing that from now on Daniel would not be with us […]

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Film Review: Steel Magnolias

Posted on March 7, 2009 - by Yvonne Lancaster

Reviewed by Yvonne Lancaster — “Steel Magnolias,” directed by Herbert Ross, includes the cast of Sally Field, Dolly Parton, Shirley MacLaine, Daryl Hannah, Olympia Dukakis, Julia Roberts, Tom Skerritt, Dylan McDermott, Kevin O’Connor and Sam Shepard. The story centers around six women customers at Truvy’s Beauty Parlor in a small Louisiana town. They share gossip and good natured ribbing as they deal with the joys, sadness and the trials and tribulations of their everyday lives.  Through their strong and lively personalities and their different points of view, each woman has her own unique way of expressing love, loss, pain and […]

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Film Review: The Savages

Posted on March 6, 2009 - by Fran Dorf

Reviewed by Fran Dorf — Written and directed by Tamara Jenkins, The Savages is a nuanced, closely observed film about a middle-aged brother and sister reckoning with their guilt, responsibility, and ambivalent feelings when their long estranged father develops vascular dementia and has to be placed in a nursing home. Funny and tragic, with amazing performances by the gifted Philip Seymour Hoffman and Laura Linney as siblings Jon and Wendy, with incredible work by Philip Bosco as their father, Lenny, The Savages lacks a single false moment. It believably conveys complex characters and their tragic situation without trying to imposing […]

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Defining Moments

Posted on March 5, 2009 - by Eric Tomei

Sometimes in life you have that moment that changes everything.   It could that first moment you fell in love, getting into that college you always wanted, or winning the gold medal in the race you trained so hard for.   Most of life’s defining moments can be just ordinary, everyday events or comments that upon further reflection could be the catalyst you need to make a change in your life. I remember once when I was a junior in high school, I was 16 years old, and typical of all 16 year olds, you think you know everything.   […]

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How Can I Let Go of Anger After the Death of a Child?

Posted on March 5, 2009 - by Fred Luskin

Question from Jay: My son Josh died July 12, 2008, from a drug overdose. The person who sold him the drug was his girlfriend’s mother. The police did an investigation that went nowhere due to the fact that they needed one of my son’s friends to make a buy off of her, but no one had the guts to do it. I know that she sold him the drugs because of a conversation that I had with my son two nights before he died. I was waiting to have spinal fusion surgery and was in constant pain, and my son […]

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When Words Become Precious Gifts

Posted on March 5, 2009 - by Sandy Fox

by Sandy Fox I often think of an afternoon stage production I attended with five friends because it confirms to me that my child lives on in other hearts as well as mine. While waiting on line to get in to the production, I saw an old aquaintance whose chidren knew my daughter Marcy. The mother, Yetta, and her son Mark were there to see the production also. Mark’s wife wrote it and stars in it. After saying hello to Yetta, I was introduced to her son. “Mark, this is Sandy Fox. Do you remember Sandy’s daughter, Marcy Finerman?” Before Mark’s […]

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Losing the ‘Father of My Heart’

Posted on March 5, 2009 - by Anne Hamilton

By Anne Hamilton, M.F.A. — On November 25, Gerald Schoenfeld, the longtime Chairman of the Shubert Organization, suffered a heart attack in his Manhattan home. Shock waves went through the Broadway community. I was devastated by his death because he was the closest thing to a “father of my heart” that I had. I’ve worked in the professional theatre in New York for almost 20 years, and Gerry gave a lot of life to my experience, first as my professor at Columbia, and then as my mentor and champion. I’ve realized throughout the years that I’ve collected father figures, and […]

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How to Talk To Your Doctor: Getting What You Want and Need, for Caregivers and Families

Posted on March 4, 2009 - by Carol O'Dell

Most of us pine for the days when we had home town doc who delivered us, knows everything about us–and cared that we stay alive. Not that most ever had that–but it sure sounds good, doesn’t it? As a caregiver to my mom who had Parkinson’s, heart disease, and Alzheimer’s, trust me, I’ve spent a whole lot of time in the doctor’s offices. I’ve gone round and round trying to get them to understand not only what my mom needed, but what I could handle. I did a little research on-line to find out various ways to find a good doctor, and […]

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Creating Memorial Services with Heart

Posted on March 4, 2009 - by Carol O'Dell

By Carol O’Dell Creating a meaningful memorial service for your loved one is cathartic, and you don’t have to wait until your loved one passes to begin to think about what they — and you — want and need. It’s a part of caregiving you’d rather not think about, but it’s the last thing you can do to honor their wishes and gather everyone around to reminisce, consol each other, and share precious memories. Planning funerals and/or memorial services takes time, and you’d rather spend those last few weeks and days your loved one has on earth at their side. […]

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