Grief triggers are the unexpected reminders that knock you sideways months or years after a loss — a song on the radio, a familiar smell, a stranger’s phrase. Here’s why grief triggers happen, what to do when one ambushes you, and 8 ways to live alongside them.
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There is a phone booth in the middle of the desert in Joshua Tree. It was installed by Colin Campbell and Gail Lerner in honor of their two children, Ruby and Hart, who died in a 2019 car crash. It lives out there amid the tall cholla cacti and the wind that sweeps circles into the salt and sand. I have been thinking about this telephone lately, of how few spaces we have to offload our grief. In her book, Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss, Hope Edelman offers a handful of events that she believes have the potential to change […]
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Grief Changes You – Awareness Helps You to Rebuild Loss changes you. It’s natural to feel lonely and unsure when someone important is no longer there. When depression that follows loss is part of the picture, everything can feel heavier and harder to move through. For a long time, that weight can feel constant – like you’re moving through fog. Separation can also create a space you don’t recognize, but it can also help you see yourself without old patterns or expectations. That distance can feel uncomfortable at first, but it is often where something begins to shift. You start […]
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It’s Spring and you find yourself watching people around you excitedly making plans for their upcoming summer vacations. Instead, what are you doing? You are thinking about how much you miss your loved one. How long has it been? Bereaved people are often asked this question. I ask it of you, “How long has it been?” Now answer this question: “How long does it feel like it’s been?” A common answer is, “On one hand it feels like yesterday. On the other, it feels like a long time ago.” Why do we experience our lives like this? How can something […]
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Memorial Day is meant to be a day of remembrance, but for those who are actively grieving, the holiday can feel like an emotional ambush. Here’s how to cope with grief on Memorial Day, honor the loved one you lost, and protect your own heart on a day designed for remembering.
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Surviving siblings are sometimes called the forgotten grievers. Brothers and sisters lose their oldest witness, their playmate, the keeper of their childhood — and the world too often expects them to be the strong one. Here’s why sibling loss is uniquely complicated, and 7 ways to honor your grief.
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Mother’s Day after loss can feel like an emotional minefield. Whether you’re grieving your mother, a child, a sibling, or anyone you love, here are 9 compassionate, therapist-tested ways to cope with grief on Mother’s Day, honor your person, and find a quiet thread of hope on a tender holiday.
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When someone you love is grieving, the fear of saying the wrong thing can keep you frozen on the doorstep. Here are 12 things to say to a grieving friend, 5 things to never say, and the simplest, most powerful gift you can offer when words run out.
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Grieving Who We Were Before the World Changed I didn’t need another reason to mentally and emotionally struggle. It’s what I have always known, what continues for me. There is a quiet kind of grief that doesn’t always come with a clear ending. It’s the grief for the version of ourselves that existed before Covid struck, before uncertainty became the norm, and before we were reshaped by it. We not only lost loved ones, but we lost ourselves. We were quietly expected to continue, to move forward, but not everyone has been able to do that. Long-Covid is something many […]
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Skating is a sport I shared with my beloved sisters. When we were young girls, we proudly carried our skates in plaid bags and raced to be the first ones on the ice. Margie, my older sister, the most talented, Jane, the youngest, was athletic, and I, the middle sister, a bit of a klutz. Little did I know that skating would become the chord that would bind me, honor, and remember, and forever find peace and joy with my sisters. Throughout my life, somehow the ice called me, a pull I never quite understood, my happy place, where […]
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““ Success in marriage is more than finding the right person. It’s becoming the right person.” Many of us had those “puppy love crushes” in our teenage years with no expectation of it leading to the altar. I purchased a cute Valentine’s Day card for a “guy” I was dating on-again, off-again. There was no intention in mind other than to get his attention with a bit of lighthearted humor. For all I knew, he could have promptly discarded the greeting card. On the front of the valentine was a picture of a sad, droopy hound dog and the words: […]
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Another New Year’s celebration has come and gone. For me, the reality of another year my daughter didn’t live to see is a painful one. Even many years after her death. Whether your grief is fresh or seasoned, New Year’s celebration and traditions of new beginnings in the form of yearly resolutions can be extremely painful. I often describe it as a “slap in the face” reminder that the world has moved on without my daughter—while I still think of her and miss her every day. It all started in September 2009, when my 4-year-old daughter died in a sudden, […]
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I’ve always found it strange that there’s no word for a parent who loses a child. Why do widows, widowers, and orphans get to have all the fun? I think it’s time for someone to right this wrong. Bear with me for a moment as I reaffirm what you already know: children aren’t supposed to die before their parents. That’s just not the way life should work. We give birth to children or adopt them, we love and nurture them, we raise them, they grow up, we grow old, and then we die. The circle of life, sunrise, sunset, […]
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In our culture, grief is often something we are expected to move through quietly and efficiently. After the funeral, after the condolences fade, families are handed the ashes of someone they love and then left largely on their own to figure out what healing looks like. There is an unspoken expectation of “closure,” as if love ends where a life does. But what if grief is not something to close, but something to continue? I came to this question through two worlds that have shaped my life – hospice nursing and the arts. As a hospice nurse, I have sat […]
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It is the holiday season, and in those first year or two, the pain of not having my son home for the holidays was overwhelming. What hurt most was his absence—no longer buying him his eight Chanukah gifts, not watching him light his menorah alongside his sister’s, and alongside the family menorah that my wife and I light together. Going to my in-laws’ home on Christmas was just as difficult, seeing gifts under the tree for everyone except him. Simply knowing he was not there was emotionally draining for us, year after year. Over the years, this particular pain has eased little […]
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“Heaven is right where you are standing, and that is the place to train.” — Morihei Ueshiba, founder of Aikido Grief is one of the deepest kinds of spiritual work we will ever do because it arises from the deepest parts of who we are. As we explore these depths, we discover one of the most fundamental human behaviors, which is the reflexive habit of turning away from pain. Everything in our mental, physical, and emotional DNA tells us to avoid discomfort at all costs. We are wired to seek pleasure and to avoid pain. But this habit to avoid […]
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For a long time, my go-to stress mode was restriction. Not just with food, but with everything. When life felt uncertain, I’d tighten my grip. Shrink my schedule. Shrink my appetite. Shrink myself. It was a way of controlling what I could. A survival reflex from years of starving out my own needs while serving everyone else’s. The irony is that I built a life feeding others, yet often forgot to feed myself. Grief made that pattern louder. It’s strange how something can feel heavy and hollow at the same time. The weight of loss. The emptiness of absence. The […]
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As time progresses, new reasons to mourn may rap on your door. Birthdays, anniversaries, milestones, major holidays—even seemingly innocuous events may reignite sorrow. A veil of tears might distort your vision as your grandchild toddles around. If only my husband could see his latest grandchild learn to walk. Conversely, if your child died or went missing, the growth of other people’s kids might activate strong reactions. Consider revisiting this book then. It is also helpful to face significant dates with a ritual. According to Drs. Evan Imber-Black and Janine Roberts, “when healing rituals have not occurred, or have been […]
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The last time that I saw my father, I was 7. He died when I was 28. But I truly lost him at 43 Grief. Such a complex topic—one that we do not speak about enough. Grief shows up in many situations; it is not only about the passing of a loved one. In reality, we are all faced with grief throughout our lives, often on a subconscious level. And we rush through those events without honoring them for what they truly are: rites of passage—moments that mark profound transitions and have the power to transform us completely. Running From […]
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When we think of grief, most of us picture the loss of someone we love. Yet there is another kind of grief, quieter and often unnamed: the grief of losing touch with parts of ourselves. For some, early trauma or difficult experiences meant silencing our voice, hiding our needs, or abandoning joy in order to stay safe. These strategies helped us survive. But later in life, we may realize how much of ourselves has been left behind. That realization can feel like grief — because it is. This form of grief doesn’t come with rituals or sympathy cards. It doesn’t […]
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When a Parent is Ninety: Grieving the Loss of a ChildGrief has no expiration date. Whether you are thirty or ninety, the loss of a child shakes the soul. For a 90-year-old parent, this loss can feel especially disorienting — as if the natural order of life has been reversed. No matter how many years have passed, a parent never stops being a parent, and the heart never stops longing for the child it has loved.The Butterfly and the Empty BranchImagine a butterfly resting on a branch — delicate, vibrant, part of the garden’s beauty. It is late in the […]
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Ending Your Life Is Not the Answer You are at the end of your rope, and you can’t take it any much longer. You are in pain and you are suffering and you feel there is no hope. The first thing that you need to do is to seek the services of a professional counselor. As a published author of a managing fear book and as a layman, here are five reasons why suicide is not an option to your problems. Things Change Over Time Regardless of your situation, things do not stay the same. You may feel very bad […]
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Five Ways to Get Through the Holidays Holidays can be difficult when someone you love has died. Or you’ve lost your job. Or an important relationship has ended. It can be hard to watch others being joyful and merry while your life feels joyless. You may need to be more intentional about your plans this year. Here are 5 innovative ways you can get through (and maybe even enjoy them). Light a candle. Engage in a meaningful ritual. Set aside some intentional quiet time to think of your loved one (and your life). Perhaps write a letter letting him or […]
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Five Tips After the Death of a Child From the moment you get the news that your child has died, you are thrust into a surreal world. People are calling—including doctors, nurses, detectives, police, coroners, and funeral directors. You are disoriented, yet there are decisions that require your attention and macabre tasks you must attend to. Most of us rise to the occasion and react later. When you look back, you will undoubtedly wonder, “How did I get through that?” You will also be emotionally and physically confused for a long time. Take care of your mind and body and […]
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Making the Most of Bedside Visits Whether you are convalescing at home or are in a hospital or other facility right now, there are some simple things you can do with a loved one or companion – that will feel good and also help you to heal. In the hospital setting, you may be in the care of a physical therapist. Such a specialist can help you work wonders on the way towards recovery. But the demands on their time are such that your needs for physical exercise cannot be met by them alone. Time is of the essence here; […]
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The profound impact of pregnancy loss often goes unspoken in society, yet it affects countless families each year. Through the story of Lindsey Henke, a licensed clinical social worker and psychotherapist, we gain insight into the complex journey of loss, grief, and healing that follows the death of a baby. A Life-Changing Moment In 2012, Lindsey Henke experienced what no expectant parent should ever face. After a seemingly normal 40-week pregnancy with her daughter Nora, she noticed reduced fetal movement the night before her scheduled delivery. Upon arrival at the hospital, Lindsey and her husband received devastating news: their baby […]
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The holiday season can be particularly challenging for those who have lost loved ones. In a heartfelt discussion on the Open to Hope Conversations podcast, Dr. Gloria Horsley and her daughters, Dr. Heidi Horsley and Rebecca Barra, shared their personal experiences and professional insights about managing grief during the holidays. Understanding Holiday Grief The first holiday season after losing a family member often proves to be the most difficult. Rebecca Barra, who lost her father four years ago, initially resisted setting up holiday decorations or participating in festivities. Despite having four children, she struggled with acknowledging the holidays without her […]
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Finding Hope Through Breathwork Grief is a universal experience, yet it is deeply personal. It touches every corner of our lives, reshaping our identities, relationships, and even our understanding of the world. For some, it comes like a tidal wave, sudden and overpowering. For others, it settles in slowly, like a fog that doesn’t lift. No matter how grief manifests, it often brings questions we don’t know how to answer: How do I move forward? Can I ever feel whole again? As someone who has walked this path, I’ve learned that grief doesn’t just affect the heart or mind—it takes […]
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Valuable Lessons about Holiday Grief “The joy we feel has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with the focus of our lives.” (Russell M. Nelson) Holidays were always a Big Deal in our family until the death of my son. They began with family and friends gathering for Halloween costume parties and ended only when the calendar flipped to a new year. The only thing that could make them better was if the next year could be better than the last! When my son died in 1993, we made a lot of changes […]
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In a recent episode of Open to Hope Conversations, Dr. Gloria Horsley and Dr. Heidi Horsley welcomed Dr. Shweta Vikram, an international speaker, best-selling author, and Ayurvedic practitioner. Dr. Vikram shared valuable insights on coping with grief and loss, drawing from her personal experiences and professional expertise. A Journey Through Loss Dr. Vikram’s connection to grief and loss runs deep. Her early experiences with the loss of her grandfather and aunt shaped her understanding of grief. Later, she faced the profound loss of both her father and father-in-law within two days of each other, which became the inspiration for her […]
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Grief is a deeply personal journey, and while everyone’s experience is different, listening to others share their stories and insights can be incredibly comforting and healing. Podcasts about grief offer a range of perspectives, from experts in mental health and mindfulness to everyday people sharing their personal stories. Here’s a list of top grief podcasts that provide valuable support, empathy, and understanding for those navigating loss. 1. Open to Hope Podcast The Open to Hope Podcast, hosted by Dr. Gloria Horsley and Dr. Heidi Horsley, is a powerful resource for individuals dealing with loss. Drawing from personal experiences and professional […]
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Tools to Ease ‘Catastrophizing’ My husband and I are Digital Nomads who work remotely and travel, and for the most part, it is fun and interesting. In early grief, however, after I lost my 20-year-old son to suicide, I never thought I’d leave my home, much less travel around the world. Getting out of bed and feeding myself was a major triumph in the months after my loss. Aside from overwhelming grief, I had a sense of dread and foreboding. I was certain I’d lose my husband or another family member next. The world felt unsafe, and my home was […]
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Re-imagining Hope The silent voice of trauma lies idle in the body. Years of dormancy may be followed by its unexpected impact, often on the precipice of healing. As I fought for justice in my brother’s unsolved homicide, I knew I was losing my life. Over nineteen years, that awareness never became clearer to me than the moment I learned I had breast cancer. My fight for justice, which ushered in the decline of my health, also initiated a creative approach to rise above the unresolved and touch the edge of hope. Engaging with Stress Stress can be a positive […]
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Just like you, Harriet Hodgson has lost loved ones. Just like you, she sought help. When Harriet couldn’t find the help she wanted, she wrote Daisy a Day, 365 short readings about coping with grief. Her tender, thoughtful words can help you find your healing path and keep walking toward the future. Daisy a Day is the hug you need.
From the very first page, Grief Doodling invites action. Topics range from the benefits of doodling to why doodling is fun to doodling tips and responding to doodling prompts. The prompts, based on grief research, promote self-worth and healing. This is a hopeful book—something all grieving kids need.
Spiritual Woman is like a dear friend, at your side when needed, reliable and ready to help. From the first page to the last, this daily guide empowers you. Read it in chronological order or pick any page and start reading. Keep Spiritual Woman on your bedside table. Stick it in your backpack or purse. Give a copy to a friend or colleague. Tell other women about it too, for we’re all in this life together.
Feel like you’re stuck in grief? Write your way out by following the steps in this concise, easy-to-use book. You need to tell your grief story. This book helps you do it with tips on your thinking place, writing place, how to write, what to write, and resources to boost your spirits. Grief in Your Words helps you create a path to the future.
Are you feeling overcome by grief? Join Dr’s Heidi and Gloria Horsley and their guest Dr. Mary-Francis O’Connor to learn about the physical nature of grief and ways that you can understand your body and learn ways to manage your responses. Dr. O’Connor is the author of The Grieving Brain and The Grieving Body: How the stress of loss can be an opportunity for healing. https://media.blubrry.com/open_to_hope_1/www.opentohope.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Mary-Frances-OConnor_-Healing-Through-Grief.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | Download
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Has grief affected your body and mind? Join Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi Horsley with guest Kristina Amelong for a discussion on healing after loss. Kristina, a bereaved sibling, authored Ten Days to Optimal Health and the memoir What My Brother Knew.
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The death of both parents can leave us feeling lost and alone. Join Dr. Heidi Horsley and her guest Sundari Malcolm to discuss tools you will need to manage one of life’s greatest transitions. Sundari lost her mother to Breast Cancer, and four years later lost her father to Brain Cancer. She is the author of the Grief Gem, and the founder of A Healing Doula. Sundari is also the BIPOC Grief Educator and Care Curator for The Dinner Party. Visit Sundari Malcolm at: ahealingdoula.com https://media.blubrry.com/open_to_hope_1/www.opentohope.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Sundari-Malcolm_-Lifes-Greatest-Transition.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | Download
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Are you feeling stuck in your grief and looking for tools to help you move forward? Join Rebecca Horsley Bara, MATP, E-RYT 500, for a free Grief Release workshop. Using a combination of movement, meditation, writing, and sound healing, Rebecca will guide you in exploring your grief and discovering new paths to healing. This self-paced workshop allows you to pause at any time, giving you the space to spend more time on sections that resonate with you. Take the first step toward healing and find a way forward in your grief journey. https://media.blubrry.com/open_to_hope_1/www.opentohope.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Free-Online-Workshop_-Grief-Release-with-Rebecca-Horsley-Bara.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | Download
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Wondering how to navigate the Holidays after a loss? Join Dr. Gloria Horsley, Dr. Heidi Horsley and Rebecca Horsley, President of the Open to Hope Foundation, for a candid discussion of how the Horsley family handled the holidays after the death of their son/sibling , and the recent death of their husband/dad. https://media.blubrry.com/open_to_hope_1/www.opentohope.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/Navigating-the-Holidays.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | Download
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Are you looking for ideas to get you through a loss? Join Dr’s Gloria and Heidi Horsley and their guest Sweta Srivastava Vikram international speaker, best-selling author of 14 books, and Doctor of Ayurveda (AD) who is committed to helping people thrive on their own terms. Her latest book, The Loss That Binds Us. Visit Sweta Srivastava Vikram at: swetavikram.com https://media.blubrry.com/open_to_hope_1/www.opentohope.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/Sweta-Srivastava-Vikram_-Practical-Tips-for-Navigating-Loss.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | Download
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Barbara Seim shares her journey at the Helping Parents Heal conference. Helping Parents Heal is a non-profit organization dedicated to assisting parents whose children have passed. https://media.blubrry.com/open_to_hope_1/content.blubrry.com/open_to_hope_1/Barbara-Seim-Calming-Yourself-in-Grief.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | Download
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The death of a loved one often brings up an array of feelings. How do we manage expectations and anger in grief? Join host Dr. Heidi Horsley, along with her guest Dr. Sweta Vikram, as she speaks openly about how she managed expectations and anger after the death of her beloved family members. Dr. Sweta Vikram lost her father and father-in-law, this was nine years after the death of her mother. Sweta is the best-selling author of 14 books, including her latest; The Loss That Binds Us; 108 Tips on Coping with Grief and Loss. Sweta was voted as “one […]
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How do we navigate life after the death of a parent? Join host Dr. Heidi Horsley, along with her guest Dr. Sweta Vikram, as she speaks openly about how she navigated life without her parents. Dr. Sweta Vikram lost her father and father-in-law, this was nine years after the death of her mother. Sweta is the best-selling author of 14 books, including her latest; The Loss That Binds Us; 108 Tips on Coping with Grief and Loss. Sweta was voted as “one of the most influential Asians of our time,” and the winner of the “voice of the year” award. […]
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Does it feel impossible to find a new normal after a loss? Join host Dr. Heidi Horsley, along with her guest Dr. Sweta Vikram, as she speaks openly about how she navigated the death of her beloved family members. Dr. Sweta Vikram lost her father and father-in-law, this was nine years after the death of her mother. Sweta is the best-selling author of 14 books, including her latest; The Loss That Binds Us; 108 Tips on Coping with Grief and Loss. Sweta was voted as “one of the most influential Asians of our time,” and the winner of the “voice […]
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How do we transform our grief through creative expression? Join Host Dr. Heidi Horsley and her guests, Rebecca Horsley Bara, Jason Wendroff-Rawnicki, and Jordon Ferber to discuss creative ways to release grief. Rebecca Horsley Bara is the President of the Open to Hope Foundation, and serves as a trustee on The Compassionate Friends Foundation Board. Jason Wendroff-Rawnicki started Sibs Online, a bereaved sibling peer support group and is featured in the book, Faces of Grief. Jordon Ferber hosts the Where’s the Grief podcast. He facilitates a Compassionate Friends sibling support group, and runs The Russell Ferber Foundation with his family.
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Is it possible to learn something from your grief? Join host Dr. Heidi Horsley and her co-host Alan Pedersen as they discuss how grief can be a teacher. Joining them are, Jason Wendroff-Rawnicki, Carin Mikos, Jan Jeremias, Bill Correll, Jordon Ferber, and Kelli Holst. Co-host Alan Pedersen has presented programs for grieving families in over 1,600 cities and is the former Executive Director for The Compassionate Friends. Jason Wendroff-Rawnicki, is a somatic therapist, who started SIBS online, a weekly peer to peer support group. Carin Mikos, is the creator of Quietus House, and podcast host for In the Gap. Jan […]
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How do we take care of ourselves when we are so busy taking care of others after a loss? Join Host Dr. Heidi Horsley and her guests Tysha Scott and Anne Smith as they discuss the importance of the preservation of self. Tysha Scott is the owner and management consultant of TS Management Consulting and is the Executive Board Member of Classic Stage Company. Tysha has been a theater teacher for middle school, high school, and college. She was married to Phillip Randall Scott for 30 yrs. until his untimely death. Anne Smith is one of nine children, and her […]
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Open to Hope is an online community offering inspirational stories of loss, hope and recovery. We believe hope is the bridge between loss and recovery.
