Grief after suicide loss carries a unique weight of shock, guilt, and unanswered questions. Here’s why suicide bereavement is different, what genuinely helps survivors, and where to find support and hope.
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Losing a parent as an adult is one of the most common yet most minimized griefs there is. Here’s why it hits so hard, why the world often underestimates it, and how to grieve a mother or father without apology.
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We grieving people know a lot about collateral damage when someone we love dies. It’s not just the loss of the person in our lives, although that would be enough. There are other losses, too. Death doesn’t happen in a vacuum. While the death of our person may be the headline, there are other related stories and losses. Death doesn’t come alone and doesn’t leave empty-handed. Our grieving lives are like having a home that has clearly been robbed, but we don’t know what all is missing. It can take a long time to discover all the valuables that have […]
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How long does grief last? There is no fixed deadline, but research reveals clear patterns in how most people move through loss. Here’s what the science shows about grief timelines and why “getting over it” is the wrong goal.
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Miscarriage and pregnancy loss carry a particular kind of grief: real, profound, and often hidden from the wider world. Here are 7 compassionate, therapist-tested ways to grieve a miscarriage and honor the love you carried for a baby who never came home.
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Broken heart syndrome is a real, temporary heart condition that intense grief or shock can trigger, mimicking a heart attack. Here’s what the science says, who is most at risk, and when to seek emergency care.
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Grief and guilt are deeply intertwined — “what if” and “if only” haunt many grieving people. Here’s why guilt is such a common part of loss, the different forms it takes, and how to release blame you were never meant to carry.
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Crying and grief are deeply connected, but the relationship is complicated. Some bereaved people cry constantly; others can’t seem to cry at all. Here’s what the science actually says about crying in grief, and 6 ways to honor your own pattern — whatever it looks like.
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Delayed grief is when mourning arrives long after a loss — months or even years later, sometimes triggered by something small. Here’s why grief gets postponed, what commonly unlocks it, and why a late-arriving grief is still normal.
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Grieving teenagers often mourn in ways adults misread — through anger, withdrawal, or seeming indifference. Here’s how teens grieve, what they need, and how parents and caregivers can support a grieving adolescent.
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It is a well-documented phenomenon: a person loses a limb, yet they can still feel it. The brain continues to fire signals to a hand or a leg that is no longer there. They reach for objects with fingers that do not exist or try to stand on a foot that has been gone for years. The nerves are firing based on a map of the body that has not been updated. When I lost my wife, Bonnie, six years ago, I discovered that grief creates its own version of a phantom limb. Except, I did not just lose a […]
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Disenfranchised grief is loss that society doesn’t fully acknowledge — a pet, a miscarriage, an ex, an estranged parent. Here’s what disenfranchised grief means, why it’s so isolating, and why your grief is valid even when others don’t see it.
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Caregiver grief is a complex, layered mourning that unfolds both during and after a loved one’s long illness. Here’s why caregivers grieve so uniquely, the guilt and relief that often follow, and how to heal after the caregiving ends.
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Grief and faith are deeply connected — loss can shake your beliefs or deepen them, sometimes both at once. Here’s how grief affects spirituality, why doubt is normal, and how faith can become a source of comfort in mourning.
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Grief in marriage can be devastating when you and your partner grieve differently. After losing a child, parent, or other shared loved one, couples often find themselves out of sync. Here are 8 compassionate ways to navigate grief in marriage and protect the relationship.
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Grief rituals aren’t just tradition — research shows they genuinely help us cope with loss. Here’s why rituals ease grief, ideas for creating your own meaningful memorials, and how small acts of remembrance can bring comfort.
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As I drifted off to sleep last night, my heart hummed with a familiar warmth and, in its secret way, sent out a quiet invitation to those nocturnal angels who watch over us at night. I found myself in one of those quasi-dream states in which most of me was dreaming, but there was a sliver of awareness that could witness what unfolds. I was standing alone in the gauzy grey of twilight, underneath a large exterior deck of a familiar ski lodge from my childhood. I don’t know what I was doing there but the mood was expectant, preparatory. […]
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I may be the last person in the world who didn’t know the meaning of life-maxxing. Earlier this week, I came across it for the very first time in a social media post and realized the word embodied everything I believe in and have learned through my grief journey. Life-maxxing (or maxing) started as slang, and now I see it everywhere. On social media, it’s all about maximizing and optimizing mental and physical health, productivity, career, aspirations, and financial success. And yet this word triggers a much deeper meaning for me. It means living life to the fullest because my loved […]
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Grief and depression can look alike, but they are not the same — and knowing the difference matters. Here’s how to tell grief from clinical depression, why they sometimes overlap, and when it’s time to reach out for help.
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The door is easy to miss— a dim recess, knotted and coarse. He kept the room for a long time— some places are made of wood and plaster— this one is made of whatever people bring inside. People pass it every day already elsewhere. If you ask, he gives you the key. Not ceremoniously— just a small warmth from others who came before. The lock turns easily as though expecting them, and the two friends enter. To the first, the room offers nothing— white walls, corners meet in muted shadows, light without direction. She […]
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Talking to children about death is one of the hardest conversations bereaved families face — and one of the most important. Here is an age-by-age guide to talking to kids about death, what language to use, and how to support grieving children of every age.
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When you meet someone new, it’s the heat that won’t break, the dry cleaner down the street that’s too expensive, how you take your coffee. We sat over dinner. He sent the dish back— too spicy, he said, as if it were the dish that missed the mark. They brought something softer. He thanked them, moved on. So did I. The questions came in their usual spacing— easy enough to keep things level. He asks it and reaches for his glass before I answer. How many children? I feel the ice in my […]
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Post-traumatic growth is the scientifically documented experience of being changed for the better — not in spite of grief, but because of it. Here’s what post-traumatic growth actually means, the 5 areas it appears in, and how bereaved people slowly grow around their loss.
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A crowd is the wrong place for a whisper. Sound there is measured in weight, not meaning. A whisper asks something else. For proximity. For stillness. For the small kindness of someone leaning in, of meeting a mild breeze. It does not compete. It waits. It listens for the quiet of a wave braking at ocean’s edge. In a crowd, it is mistaken for absence. But in the dark, when one person turns and another is already listening, it becomes a bridge— not loud enough to impress, only strong enough to cross. POEM GUIDE AND […]
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The loneliness of grief is one of the most universal and least talked-about parts of bereavement. Even surrounded by people, you can feel utterly alone. Here are 7 compassionate ways to navigate grief loneliness and slowly build connection through the hardest season.
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Most mornings, the sun rises in grayscale, weighted between two gravities. I fasten the mask again— it’s thin, too thin— hoping it veils what flickers beneath. I’m tired of being praised for holding it together— as though silence is sainthood, as though endurance is free. I wonder, if the colors I see are the same as yours. Is my red the burn of a star too near, my blue a trench that swallows light? Are both tethered by forces I can’t unlearn, by concepts I have no words for? You see a calm ocean; I see depths […]
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Father’s Day after loss can feel like a long, loud reminder of everything you no longer have. Whether you’re grieving your dad, your child, your partner, or another father figure, here are 8 compassionate, therapist-tested ways to cope with grief on Father’s Day, honor the man you loved, and find a quiet thread of hope on a tender day.
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Grief triggers are the unexpected reminders that knock you sideways months or years after a loss — a song on the radio, a familiar smell, a stranger’s phrase. Here’s why grief triggers happen, what to do when one ambushes you, and 8 ways to live alongside them.
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There is a moment that comes for many people after loss. It often doesn’t happen at the funeral. It doesn’t happen during the casseroles or the sympathy cards. It comes later. Maybe it’s when you’re driving. Or folding laundry. Or lying awake at 2:17 a.m. And suddenly you think: “I didn’t say everything I meant to say.” Grief is not only about missing someone. It’s also about the unfinished sentences we carry. The “thank you” that never felt big enough. The “I forgive you” we thought we had more time to offer. The “I’m proud of you” that lived in […]
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Memorial Day is meant to be a day of remembrance, but for those who are actively grieving, the holiday can feel like an emotional ambush. Here’s how to cope with grief on Memorial Day, honor the loved one you lost, and protect your own heart on a day designed for remembering.
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Surviving siblings are sometimes called the forgotten grievers. Brothers and sisters lose their oldest witness, their playmate, the keeper of their childhood — and the world too often expects them to be the strong one. Here’s why sibling loss is uniquely complicated, and 7 ways to honor your grief.
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Mother’s Day after loss can feel like an emotional minefield. Whether you’re grieving your mother, a child, a sibling, or anyone you love, here are 9 compassionate, therapist-tested ways to cope with grief on Mother’s Day, honor your person, and find a quiet thread of hope on a tender holiday.
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Mother’s Day usually stirs up memories of celebrating my Mom with my brothers and sisters when we were kids- showering her with all the snuggles, handmade cards and French toast from the Betty Crocker Boys and Girls Cookbook. Nothing said I Love You like delivering fresh flowers to her (right out of her garden).🌷 This year, though, I’ve been thinking a lot about my dear new friend, Marlene, who will be navigating her first Mother’s Day since the shocking death of her beloved son, BJ. Marlene shared the heart shattering news on social media last year, “No words […]
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Grief seldom moves in straight lines. Rather, grief can be more like the ever-changing weather over the ocean or like the relentless tides against a rocky coast. Some days it is mist. Some days it is stormy. And sometimes, it becomes stone. I meet people years after a loss who share, “I know it has been a long time, but it still feels like yesterday.” Their lives have continued. They work. They parent. They show up. Yet their bodies remain braced, as if the moment of loss is still unfolding. This is where the conversation about psychedelic-assisted grief therapy begins. […]
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When someone you love is grieving, the fear of saying the wrong thing can keep you frozen on the doorstep. Here are 12 things to say to a grieving friend, 5 things to never say, and the simplest, most powerful gift you can offer when words run out.
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I’ve come to believe that some souls simply aren’t meant to stay here long. And I don’t say that lightly. It’s not something I understand in any earthly way, because truthfully, I don’t. There’s no logic that can explain why someone we love so deeply could be here one day and gone the next. If there’s a reason, I wish I knew it. But I don’t. What I do believe is that we’re each sent here to touch certain lives. To love certain people. To leave imprints that carry on long after we’re gone. Maybe our time, no matter how […]
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I’ve never loved anyone the way I loved Rob. Six years ago, I joined the world’s worst club when my older son shot and killed himself. He was 28. Rob suffered from depression, bipolar disorder, and alcoholism. After he died, it was my turn to find out what suffering really means. After he died, it was my turn to find out what suffering really means. In the first few weeks and months, I was gutted and in shock. So were my ex-wife, Caryn and my younger son, Zach. Our family had been destroyed. The whole thing seemed surreal—time was out […]
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In our culture, grief is often something we are expected to move through quietly and efficiently. After the funeral, after the condolences fade, families are handed the ashes of someone they love and then left largely on their own to figure out what healing looks like. There is an unspoken expectation of “closure,” as if love ends where a life does. But what if grief is not something to close, but something to continue? I came to this question through two worlds that have shaped my life – hospice nursing and the arts. As a hospice nurse, I have sat […]
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Trying to make sense of suicide is a fool’s errand, and I’ve been that fool ever since my son Rob died. Losing any relative to suicide is traumatic, but it’s particularly devastating for parents, who feel like a failure in the most important job of their lives. I tortured myself for the better part of two years, asking the same questions over and over again—is there anything we could’ve done to prevent Rob from doing what he did? In the days and weeks after his death, the answer seemed obvious: yes! For God’s sake, I was with him […]
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Some things in life just go together like the dropped ice cream on the ground and a toddler’s cry or a young son’s first goodbye and a mother’s tears. When the first one occurs, it is followed by the second. It is more than an expectation, more than most of the time. It actually “comes with the territory” of dropped ice cream or a son’s good-bye. In a similar fashion, tasks of life are things that are more than expectations. They are things that “come with the territory”: autumn will come each year and leaves will be raked, the dryer […]
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When we think of grief, most of us picture the loss of someone we love. Yet there is another kind of grief, quieter and often unnamed: the grief of losing touch with parts of ourselves. For some, early trauma or difficult experiences meant silencing our voice, hiding our needs, or abandoning joy in order to stay safe. These strategies helped us survive. But later in life, we may realize how much of ourselves has been left behind. That realization can feel like grief — because it is. This form of grief doesn’t come with rituals or sympathy cards. It doesn’t […]
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In a New Yorker article, Tad Friend quoted a psychiatrist who had ample experience with those who vaulted to their deaths from the Golden Gate bridge. The doctor singled out a case that especially moved him: “The guy was in his thirties, lived alone, pretty bare apartment. He’d written a note and left it on his bureau. It said, ‘I am going to walk to the bridge. If one person smiles at me on the way, I will not jump’” (Tad Friend, “Jumpers,” The New Yorker, October 5, 2003, www.newyorker.com/magazine/2003/10/13/jumpers). Sadly, he jumped, which must mean nobody smiled at […]
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Andrea, I was hoping you could lend me one of your big purses. I opened the closet where they are stored. To my disappointment, the big ones I remember were not there. I’m not sure, perhaps I lent them on your behalf, and my grief brain doesn’t remember. At first, I was disappointed and sad, a minor frustration compared to the grief I carry daily, but it caused me to pause. I know you understand. I started to look in the closet quietly, and my eyes focused on the purse you had that day—the beautiful lilac-colored one with darker purple […]
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One reason grief is undesirable is the overwhelming soup of feelings it stirs up. Dr. Kenneth Doka, a prolific author and speaker on the subject of grief, explains it this way: “We rarely experience one dominant emotion at a time. We can feel depression, anger, disbelief all at once. We are a hive of emotions” (Kenneth J. Doka, Grief Is a Journey: Finding Your Path Through Loss). If his assessment feels intimidating, take a deep breath. Internal Family Systems (IFS) can help you tease apart one emotion from the next. How? We can identify parts of our soul based […]
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Message to Deceased Son My son, Michael, was born 30 years ago today. It would have been amazing to see what he would have looked like. I often dream about what he would be doing with his life. Married? Kids? Or… still living at home?!? Well, he is still at home. His stocking is on my fireplace at Christmas. His picture is on the mantle and in my home office. Michael is also at work, in my wallet, and on the internet. His rap CD, just recently created from old cassette tapes, is being heard by others for the first […]
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How do we understand bereaved children and support them after a loss? Join host Dr. Gloria Horsley, and her co-host and daughter Dr. Heidi Horsley, with their guests: Dr. Dan Wolfson, and Jordan Gross and learn techniques for helping children. Dr. Dan Wolfson is a licensed Clinical Psychologist, and the Senior Clinical Director of Experience Camps Adult Grief Retreat; he is an Adjunct Researcher and Professional Education Trainer at Columbia University’s Center for Prolonged Grief. Dr. Dan’s mother died of cancer when he was 18 yrs. old, and he is the author of; My Whole Grief. Jordon Gross is a […]
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How do we help teens and young adults navigate their changing world after a death? Join host Dr. Gloria Horsley, and her daughter and co-host Dr. Heidi Horsley, along with their guests Jordon Gross, Dr. Dan Wolfson, and Elizabeth Devita-Raeburn for an informative and honest conversation about this topic. Jordon Gross is a licensed Clinical Social Worker, and a staff psychotherapist at Wolfson Therapy. He is a training specialist for the New York Psychotherapy and Counseling Center. Jordan has extensive experience providing support to Grief Camps such as Camp COPE, and is the author of; My Whole Grief. Dr. Dan […]
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The impact of a death on a newborn’s world is a minimized and unacknowledged loss. Join host Dr. Gloria Horsley, and her daughter and co-host, Dr. Heidi Horsley and their guest Dr. Sarah Vollmann, whose sister died before she was born in a drowning accident. Sarah is a registered board-certified art therapist, licensed clinical social worker, and faculty member of The Portland Institute. She is the Associate Director of The Young Widowhood Project, and the Author of: Born Into Loss: Shadows of a Deceased Sibling.
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The Roar of Silence is a poetry collection written in the aftermath of profound loss, when language breaks down and silence becomes the only honest response. After the death of his son, a father searches for meaning in the quiet that follows devastation. These poems do not attempt to resolve grief or offer consolation. Instead, they listen—to absence, to memory, and to the altered gravity of living on. Silence appears here as wound and teacher, as accusation and refuge, as the space where truth waits without explanation. Moving through themes of fatherhood, masculinity, inheritance, endurance, and love passed forward, The Roar of […]
A self-help book that guides readers through the grieving process after losing a loved one, offering practical tools and encouragement to find hope and joy again. Written by an author who experienced significant loss, the book helps readers understand their feelings, provides steps for healing, and encourages journaling to honor the memory of the deceased. It’s designed to be a supportive resource for navigating the overwhelming emotions of grief, including holidays and special days, and recognizing when to seek professional help. Key aspects of the book: Author’s experience: Marshall wrote the book after losing close family members, using her own journey […]
Open to Hope is an online community offering inspirational stories of loss, hope and recovery. We believe hope is the bridge between loss and recovery.
