Loss of a Family Member

After Loss of a child

We know the pain can be unbearable. Read stories and find community. You need not be alone in your journey.

Articles

  • The Books That Carried Me Forward

    Posted on November 14, 2026 - by Stephen Panus

    In the days and weeks after my sixteen-year-old son, Jake, was killed in the summer of 2020, time lost its structure and any sense of a future had collapsed into something shapeless and irrelevant. There is a particular silence that follows the death of a child. It is not the absence of sound, but the absence of orientation. You no longer know where to stand inside your own life. In those early days, survival was the only measurable goal. Breathing. Standing. Enduring. Reading was the last thing on my mind. Books had always been companions. They were tools for growth […]

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  • Grief: You Don’t Know What You Don’t Know

    Posted on November 14, 2026 - by Stephen Panus

    There is a phrase often used when we talk about life: You don’t know what you don’t know. It sounds almost obvious. Until life introduces you to something you never imagined you would have to know. Acute grief after the death of a child is one of those places.Before it happens, you may understand grief intellectually. You know people lose parents, spouses, friends. You may have attended funerals, sent sympathy cards, brought food, offered hugs, and maybe even sat with people in grief. You thought you understood what grief feels like. Then real tragedy strikes your life, when a phone […]

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  • Grief—the unwanted Hero’s Journey

    Posted on November 8, 2026 - by Greg Adams

    Sometimes, we are called to a new journey, and we don’t want to go. And why would we when the call comes in the form of a loss? Loss of health with a new diagnosis. Loss of certainty about the future. Loss of faith. Loss of life for a family member or friend. Such significant losses call us to leave the life and places we knew into a journey toward the unknown. Resistance to this call is understandable, sometimes for as long as we can. This journey offers no guarantees except uncertainty and distress. To accept the call and begin […]

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  • 25 Years After September 11th: What I Learned About Grief, Families, and Hope

    Posted on September 7, 2026 - by Heidi Horsley

    Twenty-five years after September 11th, I continue to think about the families I came to know through my work with the FDNY–Columbia University Family Guidance Program. I worked closely with families who lost a firefighter in the World Trade Center attacks. I remain in touch with some of these families today, which has allowed me to witness how grief, resilience, and hope continue to evolve over time. Some of the children I once knew have grown into adults and even followed in their parents’ footsteps by becoming firefighters themselves. One of the most important things I learned is that grief […]

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  • New York City: 25 Years of Healing and Hope

    Posted on September 1, 2026 - by Heidi Horsley

    Over the past 25 years, I have watched New York City carry unimaginable loss while continuing to grow, rebuild, and find hope. What stays with me most is how people came together. Families, first responders, neighbors, volunteers, and strangers supported one another in extraordinary ways. In the midst of grief, there was also an incredible sense of connection and community. As the years passed, I watched the city change. Lower Manhattan came back to life. New buildings rose, families grew, and children like mine came of age in a city forever shaped by 9/11. The 9/11 Memorial and Museum became […]

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  • Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss: How to Grieve the Hidden Loss

    Posted on August 7, 2026 - by Heidi Horsley

    Miscarriage and pregnancy loss carry a particular kind of grief: real, profound, and often hidden from the wider world. Here are 7 compassionate, therapist-tested ways to grieve a miscarriage and honor the love you carried for a baby who never came home.

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  • The Keeper of the Room 

    Posted on July 15, 2026 - by Dan Stern

    The door is easy to miss—  a dim recess,  knotted and coarse.    He kept the room for a long time—  some places are made of wood and plaster— this one is made of whatever people bring inside.    People pass it every day  already elsewhere.    If you ask, he gives you the key.  Not ceremoniously—  just a small warmth  from others who came before.    The lock turns easily  as though expecting them,  and the two friends enter.    To the first,  the room offers nothing—  white walls,  corners meet in muted shadows,  light without direction.    She […]

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  • The Threshold of Truth

    Posted on July 10, 2026 - by Dan Stern

    When you meet someone new, it’s the heat that won’t break, the dry cleaner down the street that’s too expensive,  how you take your coffee.    We sat over dinner.  He sent the dish back—  too spicy, he said,  as if it were the dish  that missed the mark.    They brought something softer. He thanked them,  moved on.    So did I.    The questions came  in their usual spacing—  easy enough  to keep things level.    He asks it  and reaches for his glass  before I answer.    How many children?    I feel the ice in my […]

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  • A CROWD IS THE  WRONG PLACE FOR A WHISPER

    Posted on July 7, 2026 - by Dan Stern

    A crowd is the wrong place for a whisper.  Sound there is measured in weight,  not meaning.    A whisper asks something else.  For proximity.  For stillness.  For the small kindness  of someone leaning in,  of meeting a mild breeze.    It does not compete.  It waits.  It listens  for the quiet of a wave  braking at ocean’s edge.    In a crowd,  it is mistaken for absence.    But in the dark,  when one person turns  and another is already listening,  it becomes a bridge—  not loud enough to impress,  only strong enough to cross.   POEM GUIDE AND […]

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  • BETWEEN TWO GRAVITIES

    Posted on June 27, 2026 - by Dan Stern

    Most mornings,  the sun rises in grayscale,  weighted between two gravities.  I fasten the mask again—  it’s thin, too thin—  hoping it veils  what flickers beneath.    I’m tired of being praised for holding it together—  as though silence is sainthood,  as though endurance is free.    I wonder,  if the colors I see  are the same as yours.  Is my red the burn of a star too near,  my blue a trench that swallows light?  Are both tethered by forces I can’t unlearn,  by concepts I have no words for?    You see a calm ocean;  I see depths […]

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  • Who Is Your Hero?  How Has Your Hero Influenced Your Life?

    Posted on May 12, 2026 - by Nan Zastrow

    “ I believe that our heroes in life change over time based on our values and maturity. We don’t cling to those who impressed us with their status. Instead, we align our vision with those who are authentic, reliable, and role models. However,  there may also be the unlikely, unclaimed hero who changes our life and  lives in our heart forever.” (Nan Zastrow)  A  year ago, in a support group meeting,  I shared the story of how the ®Wings organization began…in Memory after the death of our son, Chad. After the group, a man who was present came forward and […]

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  • Mother’s Day After Loss: 9 Compassionate Ways to Cope with Grief on a Tender Holiday

    Posted on May 10, 2026 - by Heidi Horsley

    Mother’s Day after loss can feel like an emotional minefield. Whether you’re grieving your mother, a child, a sibling, or anyone you love, here are 9 compassionate, therapist-tested ways to cope with grief on Mother’s Day, honor your person, and find a quiet thread of hope on a tender holiday.

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  • Missing Mom On Mother’s Day

    Posted on May 10, 2026 - by Gary Sturgis

    I’ll be honest…I’ve been struggling what to say and write today. It’s because today is a day of celebration for so many, yet for so many others, this day comes packed with a punch to the gut and heart. Mother’s Day is about Sunday brunch, flowers, cards and family gatherings. It’s a day that’s filled with the celebration of life, love, happiness, gratitude, hugs and joy. But for some of you…it’s just another day living with a broken heart. There are so many different reasons (way too many for me to list in this blog) why this one day of […]

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  • A Different Kind of Mother’s Day for My Friend 

    Posted on May 9, 2026 - by Beth Marshall

    Mother’s Day usually stirs up memories of celebrating my Mom with my brothers and sisters when we were kids- showering her with all the snuggles, handmade cards and French toast from the Betty Crocker Boys and Girls Cookbook. Nothing said I Love You like delivering fresh flowers to her (right out of her garden).🌷   This year, though, I’ve been thinking a lot about my dear new friend, Marlene, who will be navigating her first Mother’s Day since the shocking death of her beloved son, BJ.    Marlene shared the heart shattering news on social media last year, “No words […]

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  • Between What Was and What Is

    Posted on April 15, 2026 - by Linda Henderson

    It has been over a decade now since losing Andrea, and grief has reshaped my world. My memories of her are as vivid as ever. I remember her as a child, with her locks of curly, golden hair and captivating blue eyes. The continuous compliments were awe-inspiring wherever we went. The way the sunlight caught her curls and the childhood laughter melted my heart as she played. I remember the pride I felt that followed me through the years, as I witnessed her milestones, accomplishments, and the way she nurtured her little boy. Those moments shaped my days, and I […]

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  • What Are Our Choices? A Personal Story By Susan Whitmore, Founder and CEO, griefHaven

    Posted on March 10, 2026 - by Susan Whitmore

    How do we handle the road stretching before us when we are grieving? Erika, my daughter and only child, died at 32 in 2002 from a rare sinus cancer. A year later, with the love and support of many people, I started griefHaven. Before Erika died, time felt like a friend. After, it became my tormentor—each day dragging on, the months ahead looking like endless miles to endure without her. When I imagined the future, it no longer held the excitement of possibility. It felt like a long, empty road. Heartbreak hits like a sudden tsunami. It leaves us gasping, […]

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  • A Day in the Life . . .If You Can Still Call It That

    Posted on February 1, 2026 - by Larry Carlat

    You wake up in the morning and for the first few hazy seconds, you think maybe it was all a bad dream. As soon as you get out of bed, a tidal wave of grief knocks you down, bringing you to your knees, and you immediately start to cry. You can’t stop crying. This is the beginning of the end of your life as you knew it—grieving your child who is no longer alive. Whether it was a long goodbye, a short goodbye, or no goodbye, you want the pain to stop but you don’t think it ever will.   […]

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  • Terrible, Thanks for Asking: What I’ve Learned About Grief

    Posted on January 24, 2026 - by Larry Carlat

    I’ve never loved anyone the way I loved Rob. Six years ago, I joined the world’s worst club when my older son shot and killed himself. He was 28. Rob suffered from depression, bipolar disorder, and alcoholism. After he died, it was my turn to find out what suffering really means.   After he died, it was my turn to find out what suffering really means.     In the first few weeks and months, I was gutted and in shock. So were my ex-wife, Caryn and my younger son, Zach. Our family had been destroyed. The whole thing seemed surreal—time was out […]

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  • New Year, Old Grief: Now What?

    Posted on January 20, 2026 - by Maria Kubitz

    Another New Year’s celebration has come and gone. For me, the reality of another year my daughter didn’t live to see is a painful one. Even many years after her death. Whether your grief is fresh or seasoned, New Year’s celebration and traditions of new beginnings in the form of yearly resolutions can be extremely painful. I often describe it as a “slap in the face” reminder that the world has moved on without my daughter—while I still think of her and miss her every day. It all started in September 2009, when my 4-year-old daughter died in a sudden, […]

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  • We Are Extraordinary Parents

    Posted on January 5, 2026 - by Larry Carlat

    I’ve always found it strange that there’s no word for a parent who loses a child. Why do widows, widowers, and orphans get to have all the fun? I think it’s time for someone to right this wrong.   Bear with me for a moment as I reaffirm what you already know: children aren’t supposed to die before their parents. That’s just not the way life should work. We give birth to children or adopt them, we love and nurture them, we raise them, they grow up, we grow old, and then we die. The circle of life, sunrise, sunset, […]

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  • Mourners Pass

    Posted on December 23, 2025 - by Perry Grosser

    It is the holiday season, and in those first year or two, the pain of not having my son home for the holidays was overwhelming. What hurt most was his absence—no longer buying him his eight Chanukah gifts, not watching him light his menorah alongside his sister’s, and alongside the family menorah that my wife and I light together.  Going to my in-laws’ home on Christmas was just as difficult, seeing gifts under the tree for everyone except him. Simply knowing he was not there was emotionally draining for us, year after year.  Over the years, this particular pain has eased little […]

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  • The Soul Knows When It’s Time to Go

    Posted on December 20, 2025 - by Larry Carlat

    Trying to make sense of suicide is a fool’s errand, and I’ve been that fool ever since my son Rob died. Losing any relative to suicide is traumatic, but it’s particularly devastating for parents, who feel like a failure in the most important job of their lives.   I tortured myself for the better part of two years, asking the same questions over and over again—is there anything we could’ve done to prevent Rob from doing what he did?   In the days and weeks after his death, the answer seemed obvious: yes! For God’s sake, I was with him […]

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  • Love Isn’t Enough

    Posted on December 15, 2025 - by Larry Carlat

      Thanks mainly to the Beatles, I always thought that love was all you need. Love was the answer, I knew that for sure. As I’ve said many times and will continue to say, I’ve never loved anyone the way I loved my older son Rob and I never will.   I’m sure you feel the same way about your child. That’s the deal when you become a parent—the amount of unconditional love you feel for your children is so enormous and overwhelming that you didn’t and couldn’t possibly have known that you had it in you to give. There’s […]

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Open to Hope Radio

  • Life Without a Manual

    Posted on November 10, 2026 - by valerielamber

    My name is Valérie Lamber, a self-published Belgian author of Greek origin. Now 58 years old, I share, through this book, the story that changed my life forever. It took me 26 years to find the strength to reopen the drawers of my memory and put into words the unimaginable. After finishing my studies, I spent three months in Purley, England, as an au pair, fulfilling a lifelong dream of improving my English. I translated this book myself into English and Greek. As I am not a professional translator, there may still be a few imperfections. I simply hope that […]

  • Why Am I Here and He Is Not?

    Posted on November 5, 2026 - by larryklopot

    In Why Am I Here and He Is Not, Larry Klopot shares the searing journey of losing his son and the long struggle to live with that loss. With honesty and vulnerability, he invites readers into a father’s grief, where sorrow and love collide, and where the search for meaning becomes both unbearable and necessary. Although this book is about death, it is also about what survives. It is about the resilience of the human heart, the bonds of family, and the fragile threads of hope that slowly emerge in the aftermath of unimaginable loss. Discover a story of: A father’s […]

  • The Trimesters of Grief

    Posted on November 2, 2026 - by Katierizzo

        Katie Rizzo’s debut memoir, The Trimesters of Grief, is a raw and intimate account of one family’s devastating struggle with opioid addiction and loss. Published by Koehler Books, with Blackstone Publishing handling audio licensing.   The Trimesters of Grief is a bereaved mother’s memoir and prescriptive guide that reframes the experience of losing a child to opioid addiction through the lens of gestation. Rizzo moves readers through invisible, undeniable, and public stages of grief toward the lifelong work of living with loss. Her book blends raw journal entries, original poetry, along with prescriptive tools. The book is pitched […]

  • Walk On

    Posted on September 30, 2026 - by Stephen Panus

    The most trusted, authoritative, and influential voice in the publishing world, Kirkus Book Reviews, raves about Walk On , proclaiming it to be “a raw, moving memoir that deftly explores grief and hope in equal measure . . . It is Panus’ unique and sometimes poetic turns of phrase, however, that truly bring Jake’s story to life . . . The author’s acknowledgment that grief is an “unwelcome topic in our society” makes his willingness to tackle it head-on even more admirable.” In today’s world, grief and adversity are everywhere, causing many to suffer and lose hope. From the depths of […]

  • The Price We Pay

    Posted on September 24, 2026 - by Colleen Friesen

    The Price We Pay is a gentle, honest exploration of grief told through the lived experience of a support group — a place where vulnerability becomes connection, and connection becomes healing. Through my own story of loss, I invite readers to witness what it feels like to sit in a circle of people who are learning to breathe again after life has changed forever. Each chapter ends with tender, reflective questions designed to help readers pause, feel, and find language for what hurts. These questions aren’t instructions — they’re invitations. They create space for readers to meet their grief with […]

  • The Roar of Silence/ A poetry collection

    Posted on April 27, 2026 - by Dan Stern

    The Roar of Silence is a poetry collection written in the aftermath of profound loss, when language breaks down and silence becomes the only honest response. After the death of his son, a father searches for meaning in the quiet that follows devastation. These poems do not attempt to resolve grief or offer consolation. Instead, they listen—to absence, to memory, and to the altered gravity of living on. Silence appears here as wound and teacher, as accusation and refuge, as the space where truth waits without explanation. Moving through themes of fatherhood, masculinity, inheritance, endurance, and love passed forward, The Roar of […]

  • Never Forget Andrew

    Posted on December 23, 2025 - by Perry Grosser

    Perry started writing after the sudden loss of his son, Andrew. This book is a compilation of the writings about his personal experiences after the loss. They are about his son and other topics that have resonated with his family, friends and many followers. This book is a resource to help bereaved parents and those who care for them, to understand and deal with the loss of their children. The profits from this book will be returned to the community. Either through Andrew’s Foundation supplying sporting equipment to those who can not afford the equipment, through supporting Bereavement groups and […]

Open to Hope TV

  • Episode 273: Lessons in Hope: New York 25 Years After 9/11

    Posted on September 7, 2026 - by admin

    What lessons have we learned over the past 25 years that can help other communities rebuild after mass violence and devastating loss? Join host Dr. Heidi Horsley and her guests, Richard Beck, Mary Fetchet, and Jim Giaccone, for an honest and thoughtful conversation about resilience, healing, and the lessons New York has learned in the aftermath of September 11. Richard Beck, an adjunct professor at Columbia University and a psychotherapist in New York City, has worked extensively with individuals and families impacted by September 11th. Drawing on his clinical experience, he offers insight into grief, resilience, trauma, and the long-term […]

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  • Episode 272: From Unimaginable Loss to Purpose and Legacy: 25 Years After 9/11

    Posted on September 2, 2026 - by admin

    How do we move from unimaginable loss to purpose and legacy? Join host Dr. Heidi Horsley for a heartfelt conversation with Jim Giaccone, Mary Fetchet , and Richard Beck as they explore this question and reflect on the ways profound loss can shape our lives, our work, and the legacy we leave behind. Jim Giaccone’s brother Joe, worked in the North Tower for Cantor Fitzgerald and was killed in the World Trade Center attacks on September 11th, Jim turned his grief into service. He has dedicated himself to helping others through his volunteer work with Tuesday’s Children, Tunnel to Towers, […]

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  • Episode 271: 9/11: Loss, Strength & Healing 25 Years Later

    Posted on September 2, 2026 - by admin

    What are the lasting impacts of losing a family member, and what unexpected strengths can emerge from grief? Join host Dr. Heidi Horsley for a candid conversation with Mary Fetchet and Jim Giaccone as they explore how profound loss can shape the way we live, serve, and find purpose.   Mary Fetchet, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Executive Director of Voices Center for Resilience, founded the organization after losing her son Brad in the World Trade Center attacks on September 11. She turned her personal loss and professional experience into a commitment to supporting families, survivors, and communities affected by […]

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  • Episode 270: Navigating Grief As a Couple

    Posted on July 20, 2026 - by admin

    Couples often grieve differently, so how do couples navigate grief after loss?  Join host Dr. Heidi Horsley, and her guests, Nate McClendon, and Lori and Raul Morales as they discuss the challenges couples can go through.  Nate McClendon is a keynote speaker for The Compassionate Friends, music educator, and musician.  He is the author of, The Emerging You, which was born from the loss of his 18 yr. old daughter Naomi, who died from an accidental fall from a 10-story building.  Lori Morales has a Grief Counselors Certification, and presents workshops at The Compassionate Friends National Conferences.  Her son Jonathan […]

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  • Episode: 269 The Role that Faith Plays in Grief

    Posted on July 20, 2026 - by admin

    Does faith play a role in grief, and if so, what role does it play?  Join host Dr. Heidi Horsley, and her guests, Nate McClendon, and Lori and Raul Morales as they discuss faith after a loss.  Nate McClendon is a keynote speaker for The Compassionate Friends, music educator, and musician.  He is the author of, The Emerging You, which was born from the loss of his 18 yr. old daughter Naomi, who died from an accidental fall from a 10-story building. Lori Morales has a Grief Counselors Certification, and presents workshops at The Compassionate Friends National Conferences. Her son […]

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  • Episode 268: The Do’s and Don’ts of Supporting Grieving People

    Posted on July 20, 2026 - by admin

    How do we support grieving people after a death? Join host Dr. Heidi Horsley, and her guests, Nate McClendon, and Lori and Raul Morales as they discuss the Do’s and Don’ts. Nate McClendon is a keynote speaker for The Compassionate Friends, music educator, and musician. He is the author of, The Emerging You, which was born from the loss of his 18 yr. old daughter Naomi, who died from an accidental fall from a 10-story building. Lori Morales has a Grief Counselors Certification, and presents workshops at The Compassionate Friends National Conferences. Her son Jonathan died at 16 yrs. old […]

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  • Episode 261: Transforming Sorrow into Strength:  The Role of Art in Healing After Death.

    Posted on December 17, 2025 - by admin

    How do you transform sorrow into strength after a death?  Join host Dr. Gloria Horsley, and her co-host and daughter, Dr. Heidi Horsley along with their guests Sharon Strouse and Dr. Sarah Vollmann to talk about the role of art in healing after a death.  Sharon is a bereaved parent, and licensed clinical professional art therapist.  She is the Associate Director for The Portland Institute, and the author of; Artful Grief: A Diary of Healing.  Sharon is also the co-founder of the Kristin Rita Strouse Foundation.  Sarah is a bereaved sibling, registered board-certified art therapist, and faculty member of The […]

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  • Episode 260: Artful Healing: Beyond the Trauma of Loss

    Posted on December 16, 2025 - by admin

    How do you restore balance after a traumatic loss?  Join host Dr. Gloria Horsley, and her co-host and daughter, Dr. Heidi Horsley to talk with their guest Sharon Strouse about her family’s journey beyond the trauma of loss, after the suicide of her 17 year old daughter Kristin.  Sharon is a board certified and licensed clinical professional art therapist.  She is the Associate Director for The Portland Institute, and the author of; Artful Grief: A Diary of Healing.  Sharon is also the co-founder of The Kristin Rita Strouse Foundation.            

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